Just Popping In

I just wanted to say a quick "HI!" It's been a while...I know. Life has taken off and we're crazy busy, as is usual for this time of the year. Here are a few reasons why:

Logan is playing football- two practices and one or two games, each week.
Logan's scouts and church activities
Shane's scouts and church activities
My church activities
My book club
Shaun's Primerica stuff (or rather the lack of business the past few weeks as he struggles to keep going)
My work
Shaun's work
My master's degree program online (VERY DEMANDING of my time)
AJ- enough said- We love the little guy and he goes everywhere and does everything with us. I'm surprised that he doesn't demand even more of our time. We've been blessed with such a carefree baby.

There's more...I'm just too tired to remember it all. Oh, and one sick kid a week for the past three weeks does not help. Mainly they have been sick for a couple days on weekends, but it does spill over a bit and causes us to get behind on, OH, HOUSEWORK. Yep, I'm not sure what that word means at the moment. It's not getting done. It hasn't been a priority. The house is messy but not dirty and gets picked up whenever we have friends over for any reason (photo sessions, dinner, visiting, etc.). Well, at least the rooms to be seen by guests get picked up. The other rooms are invisable so they don't really matter.

Yep, that pretty much says it all. Busy! One day I will have time to blog about my daily joys and rants once again. Today I will leave you with this beautiful little tidbit:

AJ SINGS! He has for the past two months- since about 7 1/2 months old. He started to sing at church when the congregation sang. Then he would sing when he would hear the organ or piano start. Next he started singing in the car/truck with the radio. Now he'll sing just to sing, even without accompanyment. Oh, and whenever he is in a large and excited crowd (football games especially) he sings because he thinks that is what they are doing and he wants to join in. It is soooo cute! Everyone notices and smiles and laughs. The funniest thing is that he has recently decided he needs to be just as loud as the people around him, which can mean that he gets VERY loud. I LOVE it! It melts my heart every time I hear him. This brings so much joy to my heart! I just listen and give him lots of hugs and kisses. At times he gets so into it that I have to hush him quickly when everyone becomes quiet at the end of a song. :)

I'M IN! EXTREME HAPPINESS

I have been on pins and needles over the past couple weeks (actually a couple months) waiting for news from my friend James at Creighton. He's my contact for my graduate school application. We've talked often over the past several months.

Today's conversation began with him stating "You're in!" but not until after an almost apologetic-sounding "Hello, how are you?" I was SOOO nervous! I read too much into it, obviously. I am now (quite literally) jumping up and down. This is what I have been working for, for years. I cannot explain the extreme joy that I'm feeling. Although, it is similar (but not in the same way) to the feeling of seeing your new born child the second they are born. Seriously! That happy. But it's a different kind of "child." Can you even imagine that feeling? I don't think anyone can, even after having a baby. It's the joy of the moment and it quickly disappears when reality sets in. I don't want reality to set in. This one comes with homework instead of diapers. Again, a different reality.

We went out for dinner to celebrate. I'd planned to cook. Plans change so easily.

Maybe one day I'll update my blog readers on the other goings-on in our lives. It's been a crazily (is that a word?) busy summer. Truly. This will make it even more so. First day of school for the kids- Mid August. My first day- August 30th. There goes the reality setting in. DANG IT! The moment has ALMOST passed. I will still enjoy the remnants.

Back to Work and AJ Update

Today was my first day back to work after my nice long 10 1/2 week maternity leave. Most of that was unpaid of course, but totally worth it. It was a hard day for me, to be so far from AJ for so long. It's going to be a hard week and I can't imagine it getting any easier for a while. I LOVE babies and especially my own. Who wouldn't? The bond between a mother and her baby is indescribable. I wish I could describe it because it's AMAZING. You carry a baby while it develops within you and then give birth to it, spend lots of quality time with it, and will never loose that bond. I have spent nearly a year with this little guy one way or another so it's very hard not to be with him now. He's perfect too. I couldn't have asked for a better baby. We are VERY blessed.

AJ did very well at day care today and did ok with bottles although he probably would have been a bit happier if he'd eaten more. He takes bottles once in a while but will now be needing to take them all day while we're apart. Of course that means I'm taking breaks to pump. Fun! It is nice to have breaks from my work. I hadn't really taken planned breaks previously.

Last week AJ had his two month checkup. Newest stats:

Height/length: 23.25 inches _____%
Weight: 11 lb. 7 oz. ____________%
Head Circumference: ____ _______%

Uh, yeah. I don't remember! I'll fill in the blanks later.

Today's First: First full day at daycare. Beginning the first week of full-time daycare. (Sniff, sniff)

Below is a photo taken by my dear friend Terrie when AJ and I visited her at work last week. She sent this photo and one of her with AJ to me this afternoon to lift my spirits. She's so wonderful!

Tidbits of Today's Thoughts

It has been a while since I blogged. Oops! Life took over as usual. It's been a crazy month. Here are a few of my recent thoughts:

1. People who get lost in K-State's new parking garage make me laugh. Seriously people? It's not that big! I'm still trying to decide if the price is worth parking there. We'll see.

2. I'm pregnant, not broken. I'm pregnant, not dumb. YES this pregnancy was planned. NO I'm not regretting it. YES my children's ages are very spread out. YES I am cute with this protruding belly; I don't mind saying so and I don't mind hearing it. WHY do I feel like I have to complain when I am asked how I'm doing knowing full well that random people I don't know that well ask me and are referring only to my pregnancy. I'm a person too you know! My life contains many aspects, pregnancy just being the most obvious at this point. Overall I am doing wonderful and loving it! YES I have some discomfort from pregnancy and YES my back aches. NO I'm not bloated, yet.

3. My boss is great! Today she decided we needed to have an ice cream social so that I could show off my 3D baby pics to some friends working down the hall. She announced this to me as she was walking out the door to a meeting. I had the small ice cream social while she was gone. :) I guess that was her plan. It was fun. She had provided the ice cream. I provided the pictures to look at. It was me and three others. What a nice late afternoon break!

4. YES, the 3D sono pics and perhaps the video (if I can upload it) will be online, probably tonight since I'm procrastinating on watching an online lecture!

5. My kids are aggravating me a lot lately. Probably because I'm always tired and therefore moody. They seem to be very loud. Logan fusses too much and doesn't think he has an "indoor voice." Shane isn't applying himself, anywhere, at times. Otherwise they are wonderful boys who just want to hug and cuddle with me A LOT. Yes, that annoys me at times but I deal with it. I love their hugs and cuddles too much to let it annoy me for very long. I'm very blessed!

Hmmm. There were three or four other thoughts that I'd tried to share however blogger has been giving me problems. Here's the short version of those:

6. Shaun has been great, most of the time. :) He's been spoiling me with meals in bed once in while and has been very understanding when I am tired and grouchy. He knows when to avoid me. He has also helped me to complete a couple photography assignments for an online class. I have a hard time being inspired for this class just because I am tired and don't want to do things by deadlines. He helps me to meet the deadlines though and has been having fun learning along side of me.

7. I have started the application process for graduate school. I am still planning to go to Creighton, in Omaha but mostly online, for Dispute Resolution and Negotiation with an emphasis on educational institutions. I tried to link this earlier but that was what started my half hour of blogging problems so I'm not going to do it again! Shaun "mentally clapped" his hands for me Monday when I called to inform him that I have decided to go ahead with the August enrollment for my application. The admissions rep assigned to me suggested that since this is a very competitive application process and only 15 people are allowed into each class that I should apply for May or June instead of waiting for the August class due to the number of students who apply for the more traditional start dates. I was told that my GPA and career goals will be a great fit for them and that I should have no problem with being accepted so I decided that I, and my family, deserve a few months break before I continue my college career. Summers are hectic enough around here and I really want to have a short time without coursework. Adding a baby to our summer baseball schedule will be enough to handle! I decided if I am not accepted in the August class then I will apply for a later class whenever offered, most likely the following January, May, or June. As long as I get in eventually I will be fine.

8. I use contractions too often so I'm cutting back.

9. There was something else... Oh well! I'll do another post if I remember and deem it important or random enough.


These were just a few "thinks" I thought I would share. :)

The End.

1/8th Inch

You know, it seems crazy that something so very tiny can make such a HUGE difference in your life. Now it's about 1/4", or the size of a tic tac. IT being my baby, or if you'd prefer, an embryo which will soon be a fetus and then my baby. No matter which way you say it it's my baby. YES: I'M PREGNANT! The past few weeks have been quite a roller coaster for me. Did you know they now make morning sickness medicine? Seriously! What a miracle drug, when I remember to take it (FTAN= First Trimester Anti-Nausea medication). I have somehow gained at least six pounds when with each of my other two pregnancies I lost weight during the first trimester. It doesn't help that I'm starting this one about 40 lbs over weight. I was within my "ideal" weight when I started with each of the boys.

Besides being overly tired, cranky, impatient, nauseous, constantly lightheaded, and feeling like I'll pass out at any moment, I've been doing very well. Being sick is the best predictor that I know of for a healthy early pregnancy. So, sick I am. I'll deal with it. I'll get through it. I just hope this time it subsides and doesn't last all the way through the pregnancy. I can wish!

I decided to go ahead and break the news because even if something does happen and I miscarriage I'll be ok. I would rather have people know why I'm upset and missing work, church, or other activities if I do have a miscarriage rather than keeping it a secret. I'm not that type of person. I also can't keep my own secrets very long (although I'm great at keeping my friends' secrets). IF something happened I would want the loving support of my friends and family. This is what led me to this decision. I'm not the type to keep quiet about something so amazing and important to me in my life. So, I plan to have a great pregnancy and to have lots of fun with it. Why not? It may not happen again. I loved being pregnant with my boys (minus the yucky side effects of morning sickness, feeling like a whale or baby machine, the heartburn, and the whole labor/birthing process). Most of all I loved feeling the baby within myself. I loved the kicks, the hiccups (if that's what they really were) and body parts pushing at my insides. It truly is amazing and the most awesome miracle I could ever ask for.

Haha! Now that I look back at my babbling I've noticed that I haven't given you much of a clue as to how far along I am. Until this past Tuesday we truly didn't know. Since I have had irregular cycles for the past nine months we were guessing I was anywhere between a month along and two-three months along. In actuallity I am currently, as of today, at seven weeks. (I know, I'm breaking my silence very early!) My due date is December 17, 2009. This happens to fall just after Fall finals here at K-State so I should be able to get at least most of the way through the semester. I'm determined to have this baby at least a week early, if all is healthy and well and the baby is ready. I don't want to get too close to my due date because if I had with my boys they each would have been over nine pounds. No thank you! I had them each early, without assistance of induction. We'll see if I can talk my body into doing it again.

On Tuesday we went in for a sonogram that literally took maybe five mintues. It was just long enough to see where the baby was, verify there is only one, and see the little heart beating. It was such a relief to see it! Since I was on Clomid last month but had had a very light period and low hormonal levels and then spotted early this month (they told me I hadn't even ovulated- ha! I proved them wrong) we wondered if possibly I'd gotten pregnant in late January or February. I hadn't had a pregnancy test in a while so we really didn't know. Clomid also slightly increases the likelyhood of multiples. One baby was good news, although we would have welcomed more if that's what we'd been given. Another reason we thought maybe I was further along- my clothes don't fit! I have somehow gone from being a bit overweight to being pregnant and actually looking it! I can not hide the fact that my belly appeared almost overnight. Seriously! It's like it remembered what it was supposed to look like at four months and decided to make me look that way. ARG! I'm not even that far yet! I'm not looking forward to seeing how big I grow this time...

Overall we are happy and a bit overwhelmed. Even though this pregnancy was completely planned we weren't really ready to go through it all again! (Are you ever?) Now we're getting used to the idea of having a baby to care for and love. We're planning for room rearrangements at home and I'm trying to figure out how I'm going to get through my last two semesters of my undergrad: one while very pregnant and the next with an infant. We'll manage as we always do and I'm sure this child will be a blessing to our family. This is the addition I've prayed and patiently awaited for. So there you go! You know now. Soon everyone that sees me regularly will know simply because my belly is not hiding very well. Happy days!

Bedtime

It's a few minutes after 8 here and I am dreading bedtime. Yep, that's right. I dread it. My kids should be very tired and ready for bed but this is not usually the case.

Shane likes to stay up too late reading. I like that he likes to read but his light never gets turned off and he stays up late reading almost every night. I normally fall asleep before him, and sometimes before his lights out time.

Logan's another story. He's impossible! Let's think back to about six and a half years ago. As a baby Logan moved into his own room at about 5 1/2 months old to sleep there every night. He was super easy to put to bed. I'd simply lay him down and he'd either go right to sleep or talk to himself a little and then go to sleep. Either way he didn't cry and he fell asleep very easily. However, about three years ago, Logan stopped being so easy at bedtime. Now he whines, screams, cries, everything and anything to not sleep in his own room. IF I let him fall asleep in my room, whether he'll be moved to his own bed later or not, he goes right to sleep. IF he is allowed to fall asleep downstairs near Shaun, he'll usually go right to sleep. However, if he is forced to sleep in his room he all of a sudden gets separation anxiety. He refuses to "sleep alone." He says he as to "sleep with somebody." His words.

A few times, to solve this issue, I've repeatedly stayed in his room until he falls asleep, normally 30 minutes or so. I'll continue this for a couple weeks or longer but it never lasts. It takes too long to get him to sleep. It also doesn't matter how many times I do this, he still wants to sleep near Shaun or I. Recently he's given in and slept in Shane's room or let Shane to sleep in his room near him a couple times. Unfortunately he will still not, at almost seven years old, sleep in his own room by himself all night. In fact, most nights that he is moved to his own room he'll find his way back to my bed. It doesn't seem to matter what I do!

Any ideas? Should I even worry about this? Because I've grown so accustomed to having Logan in my bed frequently I do feel secure knowing he's beside me but I'd really rather him be in his own room so that both he and I could get used to it again. I don't like him sleeping in my bed and I never have. He kicks, turns all around in the bed during the night, and has recently started to talk a little in his sleep.

What do I do? On one hand I just want to sleep and I want him to get a good night's sleep. For now it seems that he does this best in my bed. I even put a pillow between us so that he can't roll into me or me into him. It helps a bit with his tossing and turning. On the other hand, I want him to "grow up" and sleep in his own room every night, without being put there once he's asleep. He NEEDS to fall asleep on his own in his own bed. Doesn't he?

This is were picking my battles with my kids gets confusing. This is a battle that I've chosen to fight for so long. I'm tired of fighting it. I wish he'd just decided to sleep in his own room and make this easy on me! Maybe I should let Logan win this one. It's not about winning, just about sleep.

Since I've dealt with this for three years, I'm giving up. I want advice. I don't know that it will help but just hearing other's opinions on this may calm my fears about my almost seven year old. Will he still be ok if he continues to sleep in my room until he decides otherwise?

Here's another picture of my bedtime avoiders!

Happiness

YAY!!! I just got a notice from Amazon that my books have shipped: Three Cups of Tea: One Man... $8.25
1 Breaking Dawn (The Twiligh... $12.64 1 $12.64
1 The Host: A Novel $15.59 1 $15.59


I'm soooo excited! I probably won't get Breaking Dawn until Monday (ARGHHHHHH!) but then I'll have two weeks to read before the semester starts (I have one class to finish but only have studying and one final after this upcoming Monday and I'll have two entire weeks to study, then I have one week with no classes whatsoever). I really wish I had time to read during my semesters, but that just doesn't happen. Not if I want to get good grades and be part of my family. :)

On another note, due to all the stress in my life recently... We've decided to bring the kids out tonight to "Time Out Corner." We've been there once and had lots of fun. It's been open a few months now and I know the kids would like to go. So tonight's plan is to eat dinner (most likely at home) and then head out to have fun for a couple hours playing games in the arcade and playing miniature golf on the black-light lit neon course. Tomorrow we plan to go to Sam's in Topeka and will be bringing the kids there too. What could possibly be more fun than Sam's??? Maybe we'll find something fun to do in Topeka too, but at least we'll be together. That's my goal for the weekend, ignore chores and have fun with my boys.

Have a fantastically fun weekend!

I got a B!

This past month I took a four-week Statistics 325 course. I thought I'd like it but I really didn't. I actually kinda like math courses, as long as I understand the concepts and content. I do some stats for work so I thought even though everyone hates this course, maybe I'd get something out of it. I decided early on that a lot of the work in class was simple enough (later finding out that the work done in class wasn't ever graded but rather points were given for attendance and doing the class work). The homework was also easy. The quizzes really stunk even though they were short and fast and the exams were horrible.

Unfortunately, almost all the points for the course were based on the three large exams. For the exams we were allowed a piece of paper filled front and back with information, anything that we thought we'd need for the exam. The first exam I got an 83%. That upset me since I'd done so well on everything else (although I had one of the highest grades in my class). I quickly learned what I needed on my cheat sheet for the next two exams. The second exam, even though I'd stayed at the library and up late at home studying for a few nights, I received a 59%! For the third and final exam we could use two pieces of paper for cheat sheets, so I covered every little spot on the papers. After taking the exam I felt that I hadn't done much better than the second exam and wasn't sure what my class grade would be.

Almost two weeks later, due to some technical difficulties the instructor had with the class enrollment, I received an email with my final exam grade and class grade. I had somehow earned B's on both!!! I had no idea how I managed that, especially with such a low second exam. I had stayed at the library a couple nights in a row studying until very late (the library closes at midnight during the summer except for one room in the basement which is designated as a 24 hour study hall). I had also attended both review sessions offered.

When I had completed the exam I requested that the instructor send my exam to me by campus mail when the grades had been assigned for the class. I received my final exam in yesterday's mail and was very happy to see that the exams had been graded with leniency. I had gotten an 87%! I was ecstatic. I've never had a course that I felt was this hard (mainly because I thought the instructor wasn't teaching the material). Even though it's the first B I've received in 10 years I'm happy about it. I'd received a C in College Algebra a couple years ago, so combined with all my hard-earned A's, I now have a 3.70 GPA (down from 3.778 before the stats course). Good enough for me! I just had to share this good news! I really thought I'd get a C in this class as well.

Two more summer courses to complete (hopefully both with A's) and then a full nine hours again this fall...I'm slowly getting somewhere.

I should also mention that my family has somehow dealt well with my stress and a few missed baseball games during this month of statistics. Again, we couldn't do it without Betsy! She'll be sorely missed by all of us. She leaves in two days. :>(